Many of you know from reading my bio, listening to my BlogTalkRadio show or following the blog that I have two teens that both have some degree of executive functioning dysfunction. Each are high achieving and capable students yet they struggle with consistency in daily tasks and although better, continue to have some issues with task initiation and time management. After seeing them showing a few signs of falling back into old habits, I felt a tune up was in order.
My son, who is in the process of receiving college acceptance letters and scholarship offers has been doing an outstanding job of managing the extra workload in addition to his job and challenging coursework. Unfortunately, during the weeks leading up to Christmas Break he completely forgot to finalize something he needed to do for one of his scholarships. I got the letter over the weekend that, thankfully, allowed a grace period because I believe the organization realized that making things due during a senior's finals week prior to Christmas Break may not be the best idea. As soon as I brought the oversight to my son's attention, he remembered getting the email from his counselor. He, immediately, went to work completing what he needed to do. While he was working, I took the opportunity {while I was cleaning up the kitchen acting like I wasn't stalling...} to casually ask him what he could have done differently that would have resulted in him not forgetting to complete the task. His immediate response was what most students, and adults for that matter, would say: "I should have just done it right away when I got the email." Knowing that this would be his response and that he may need more than one solution should this happen again I said "true, but what if you couldn't take care of it right away? What could you do then?" He thought and replied "I could have put a reminder with an alert in my calendar for a later time." YES! Tune up complete, for now. Onward to the next child... My daughter, doesn't have a sustainable routine that she follows. I've done some coaching with her and suggested some tools but she hasn't found one that is a good fit yet. She gave me some valuable feedback today however and I used this to determine where we went next. She said "I have tried using putting reminders on the chalkboard in my room but that just doesn't work for me." Nice. She's beginning to think about what system might work by thinking about what system doesn't work for her. We decided to try some Time Mapping by blocking off her day into 1-2 hours segments from morning to bedtime. She then made a list of everything she needs to do, consistently, each and every day and entered them into her time blocks. I could tell immediately that she felt comfortable with the plan as she filled it in. She asked questions, "on days that I have batting practice, I'll need to move _________ to __________." She liked the control. She felt empowered. YES! Another tune up complete, for now. You see friends, I'm living it just like you and I'm thankful for the experience because I know it helps me to be a better coach for students and families. I'll keep you posted on how each of them do with their new systems. Have you had a similar experience with your teen? What system did you find worked best for them? Until next time...keep growing and blooming. Jen
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November 2016
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