{guest post} Transition Time: Middle School to high school

As if going from tween to teen wasn’t tough enough, add in the extra challenge of transitioning to a new school and you have a recipe for stress and anxiety. Even if your middle schooler is staying with the same kids when he goes to high school, he’s still moving to a new – possibly much larger – building, getting mixed in with teens who are virtually adults already and having to handle classes that will now count towards college admissions. That said, making the move is a challenge that you can help him to meet. Instead of throwing him to the wolves, spend the summer prepping for his move into the big leagues.

Before you dive into the high school transition, keep in mind that this is a process and not one singular event. While there’s a definite first day starting point, the build up to this “event” should be gradual. During this process parents, schools and the students themselves all have their roles to play. As a parent, you can start the transition during eighth grade and kick it into high gear during the summer before high school. Although there are an almost countless number of ways to help your child move from middle to high school, trying a few basic strategies can calm your student’s fears and help him to make the move.

If you’re not sure where to start, consider one (or a combination) of transition-easing ideas:

• Have a positive attitude! Instead of focusing on the negatives, or completely commiserating with your child, turn your (or and your child’s) attitude around. For example, if your child says, “I’m never going to get good grades in ninth grade. I heard that the classes are so hard and there’s so much more homework,” tell him, “I know that the work is more challenging in high school, but your classes are also much more interesting. And I know that you can do the work.”
  
  
• Talk to your child, asking what his concerns or fears are. In “Education Week” executive director of the Association for Middle Level Education William D. Waidelich, Ed.D. suggests that parents help their children to come up with solutions to their concerns before the school year starts. This may include strategies for handling a larger volume of homework or ways to meet new kids.
  
  
• Find a buddy for your child. A peer who is already in high school can provide an insider’s view of what it’s like. If his high school has a peer mentor program, ask how your child can sign up. If not, ask friends or neighbors if they know a high school student who would be open and willing to show your child the ropes. Don’t force them to hang out constantly. Have them meet up a few times or invite the older peer over to talk about what to expect in ninth grade.
  
  
• Attend school transition events. This goes for both you and your child. If your child’s new school offers a parents’ orientation, it’s likely that they will provide information on how to ease the transition as well as specifics for their school/ You’ll also have the opportunity to see your child’s school, making it easier for you to answer his questions or respond to statements such as, “I don’t see how I’m ever going to make it from one class to another in time when the school is so much bigger than my last one.”
  
  
• Do a walk through. Some schools have a special day for doing this, in which students can walk through their entire daily schedule. In the event that your child’s school doesn’t offer this, ask an administrator if you can make a visit before the first day of classes to do a dry run. Have your child create a class-to-class route for his daily schedule. Don’t let him forget to schedule locker stops or look out for where the nearest rest rooms are.
  
  
• Encourage your soon-to-be high school students to get involved in activities before the academic year begins. Some sports, activities or clubs may hold summer practices or meetings. If your child can sign up for these activities before school actually starts, he can join in during the summer months. For example, track practice may start in August or the band may hold an annual camp in July. This gives him the opportunity to meet new friends, get involved and feel like he’s part of the high school community.
  
  
• Give your child more independence. This doesn’t mean that you should let him have free reign to do whatever he pleases. When he gets to high school he will need to take on more responsibility and be more in charge of his own life. Encourage independence over the summer months by letting him take on ore responsibilities at home or babysitting his younger siblings. ​

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If you'd like even more tips on how to help the transition to high school go smoothly, download our FREE Parent Guide to High School Transition below. 

Download your FREE Parent Guide to High School Transition

Erica Loop is a mom, arts educator and freelance writer. She has an MS in Applied Developmental Psychology, and now writes at her two parenting blogs Please Shut Up, I'm Thinking and Mini Monets and Mommies.

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