 Happy New Year!
In just a few short minutes, I'm headed out the door with my husband for a few hours of couple time {running errands but I hope to get a Bloody Mary out of it!} and gathering some things for our NYE 2015. We have plans to spend our NYE, as usual, in the comfiness of home. Earlier today, I informed everyone that they need to have their #onelittleword ready to go for our festivities tonight because I want to share them. The intention of this post is to encourage you to join with me in choosing ONE word that will be your focus for 2016. Instead of resolutions, you focus on the one word and bringing it to every part of your life. You can read more about it here. As you can see by the large graphic above...my #onelittleword2016 is INTENTIONAL. My focus will be on bringing intention to each and every part of my life. Your assignment: Pick a word and join me! SHARE IT IN THE COMMENTS. I'm looking forward to reading all of your words. Jennifer P.S Would you like to get more ideas on how to live out your word for 2016? Join my newsletter as I'll be talking about this throughout the year.
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 If you're dealing with a student who seems paralyzed by certain assignments, has emotional breakdowns when they get anything lower than perfect or suffer from school related anxiety or depression this post is for you. In this post, I'll be sharing 3 ways to help a student overcome their perfectionism. Before I share the three tips, I want to let you in on a little secret. .I'm a recovering perfectionist. I still mindfully practice each of the tips I'm about to share with you. I never thought that I'd say I now look at my perfectionism, over the years, as being a blessing. Now that I've helped so many students overcome it I can honestly say that I do. Being able to share that I understand and still know what it's like to want everything to be perfect, allows me to connect with my clients on a much deeper level than someone who hasn't known the struggle. Because I've been there and overcome it, I know just how to help them. When I'm working with a student who is struggling with perfectionism, these three tips are where we begin and they all center on a main theme of changing MINDSET about mistakes. (1) Encourage and celebrate mistakes-as a parent, try to highlight what your child did RIGHT and not just focus on the grade {"you go them ALL correct"} or the mistakes {"WOW! You really bombed this time!"}. Try to find the happy medium. Don't make great performance a big deal. If your child is really struggling with a lower grade talk about how mistakes help us learn. Share that mistakes are the ONLY way we learn. Trial and ERROR. Encourage them to talk about the mistakes that they made on the assignment. Then it doesn't seem like it's such a burden. One of the things I do with my coaching clients is to ask them to share a mistake they've made since our last session. I then ask them how they turned the situation around or plan to for next time. We OPENLY talk about mistakes which is initially VERY hard for them but once we've done it a few times, they actually can't wait to share. It's freeing for them. It begins to loosen the hold of needing things to be perfect all of the time. (2) Make sure students have realistic goals {and have set them themselves}-this is a very important factor. Many times, the student has set goals that are simply too lofty for their stage in life or their ability at the time. Often, the goal was not set by them but by their parents. Sometimes, they fear disappointing their parents so much that they choose goals for themselves that they think their PARENT wants them to achieve. This pattern is a recipe that creates and allows perfectionism to take hold. Students must learn to accurately assess their ability and match their goals accordingly. Otherwise, they are constantly feeling like they don't measure up which is exactly what allows perfectionism to seep into their every thought. (3) Study models of successful people who have made mistakes along the way-the more you bring awareness to the idea of finding success through mistakes, the easier it is for a student to begin to see the benefit and begin to apply this mindset to their own life. Take a trip around Pinterest or Facebook and you're sure to find the infographic with Michael Jordan and other famous names who share their blunders and how they still ended up wildly successful. If you're a parent, openly share about mistakes you've made and how it impacted you in a positive way over time because you learned something. Even if it didn't impact you in a positive way at first, share some of the details {no need for T.M.I here...} with your child so they can see there is light at the end of the tunnel. Your "Take Action" for this week... Try the above activity of openly sharing mistakes with one another. Perhaps, if you get to eat dinner together, you could go around the table and each share something. Make it work for you and your family. I PROMISE it will get easier and easier to share because mindset will be changing. If this is too difficult, writing it in a journal for only your eyes to see can be a great first step. One more thing in the comments below... Do you, or have you, struggled with perfectionism? Time to set yourself free!!!!! Jennifer P.S If you liked this post and found it helpful, would you please share it with your friends? You can do it using one of the social media buttons on this page. Also, if you'd like to hear a little more from me {like in your inbox once a week or so} I'd love to have you join my newsletter. |
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